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Kreative Kupcakes

Monday, February 6, 2012

Too many cupcakes to choose from at this place. YUM. 
With my pre-surgery nerves kicking in I started to have a lot of anxiety. I am extremely emotional lately, as I am preparing to have my TP-AIT. I think my problem is because this surgery is so rare, with only somewhere around 600 completed since 1978. I feel like many people in the public don't understand, which I wouldn't either, had I not had this. I tell people "I am getting my pancreas out" and they are like "Oh okay, good luck!" HA! Unless you are pretty educated in the health arena, you may feel that it is equivalent to saying you are having your gallbladder out. I had my gallbladder out, and let me tell you what I am feeling now is nothing like what I felt 10 days before that surgery.

What am I feeling? Mushy, right? It is 10 days before surgery and I feel scared for my life, literally! And that pretty much sums it up in as few words as possible. Have you ever felt fearful of your life? Maybe you got a cancer diagnosis, or were in a life threatening car accident. I know many people have had this fear before and can relate. One thing I have come to realize during all this is that I truly LOVE my life. I mean I really love it, horrible, relentless pain and all. I love it so much that I repeatedly tell God that I am not done here and not ready and just no no no no no!

In an effort to get all "this" off my mind, my mom decided that in the days leading up to my surgery we will go on an adventure each day. She doesn't tell me where we are heading until we are there, and what a fun thing this is to do. We have enjoyed it so much and we both decided that we feel people (including us) don't take the time to enjoy life until something comes up that makes you face life and death. Unfortunately, we just work that way for some reason. But, if you are reading this you are lucky. You are lucky because I am reminding you right now to do these special things with your loved ones today or tomorrow. Think about where you live and what a tourist in your town would do if he or she came to visit. Go do whatever it is that you would think of to tell this person visiting today or tomorrow with a loved one. I promise you will be happy that you did.

My beautiful Mama and I...I like to wear Yoga clothes out, they need to get
some use since I am not able to go to Yoga anymore! 
So far we have gone on 4 creative and memorable "min-adventures" (I will post pictures from all of them). The first one way to Kreative Cupcakes. We enjoyed this place, a little hidden gem, in the small town of Avondale. It is on Western, in Old Town Avondale and seriously as good as Sprinkles, if not better. I am not lying. Before this little trip I was feeling blue. Blue is something I have been feeling a lot in the months of January and February. It's to be expected, but I will tell you this cupcake place made me forget all about that. Cupcakes are high in fat and probably made my pain a little worse, but I enjoyed it anyway. I could use the extra fat:-) Never thought I would see a time in my life that I would intentionally be trying to GAIN weight. It's really not that much fun when everything hurts. I always imagined it to be so fun! I believe that after the surgery the gaining weight task will become more fun.  Enjoy- more adventures of Janine and Whitney to come! And thanks for reading. I love hearing that people are reading my blog, it really makes me feel good. I always wanted to be a writer, I just never knew what to write about.

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